Happiness Tuesdays

The only thing that will make you happy is being happy with who you are.

If you were ask most people what they want most out of life, the answer would be to be happy. Simple enough goal, right? 

But for whatever reason, happiness is elusive to most people. 

For whatever reason they simply don’t allow their lives to be basked in happiness. 

If you have ever wondered “Why am I not happy?” then this blog post is for you!

Now here’s the thing: nobody consciously chooses to be unhappy, but you can cause yourself a lot of misery by engaging in negative mental habits. 

The outcomes we experience in life are often the result of our habits.

Eliminating these counterproductive habits from your life is the first step to experiencing true happiness.

I encourage you today to make an effort to eliminate habits that negatively impact your happiness. 

You can start by tacking these 8 negative habits:

1 – Having unreasonable timelines.

Nearly any goal is reasonable – anything you can dream up and believe in 100% is usually possible. 

Unfortunately, it’s common to overestimate what can be accomplished in a certain amount of time which is why lots of people freak out and give up on a dream before even starting.

Interestingly, most individuals underestimate what’s possible over longer stretches. Be sure your timeline is reasonable.

• An overly optimistic estimation will leave you feeling defeated when you’re unable to attain your goal on schedule.

2 – Holding a grudge.

Focusing on negative events creates unhappy feelings.

When taken when to the extreme, a grudge can lead to engaging in negative actions to get back at someone.

• Holding a grudge has been described as drinking poison and then expecting your enemy to suffer. Let go of your negative feelings toward others!

3 – Spending too much time in the past or future.

It’s challenging to be happy if you’re constantly regretting the past or fearing the future. 

Learn from your past missteps and avoid dwelling on them. 

Avoid worrying about the future. 

Worrying honestly does not take away tomorrow’s troubles. 

It just takes away today’s peace. 

A day of worry is more exhausting than  a day of actually getting down to do the work.

Worrying is using your imagination and energy to create something you DON’T want. 

Worrying is just a waste of time. 

It doesn’t change anything but instead messes with your mind and steals your happiness.

• If you foresee potential challenges ahead, calmly prepare solutions. 

• If you live in the present moment, being happy becomes much easier.

4 – Embracing a victim mentality.

It’s common to search for excuses for our negative experiences. 

We often try to justify staying in our current circumstances. 

You may very well be the victim of some unfortunate situation, but it’s your responsibility to work your way out of it.

• Taking responsibility for the happenings in your life is powerful. Countless individuals have overcome incredible odds. You can certainly be among them.

• As Steve Maraboli so wisely said, your complaints, your drama, your victim mentality, your whining, your blaming and all of your excuses have NEVER gotten you even a single step closer to your goals or dreams. Let go of your nonsense. Let go of the delusion that you deserve better and go EARN it.

• The problem that we have with a victim mentality is that we forget to see the blessings of the day. Because of this, our spirit is poisoned instead of nourished.

5 – Comparing yourself to others.

Everyone starts with a unique set of talents, skills, and experiences. 

Avoid comparing yourself to others.

If you want to make a comparison, compare yourself to your recent past.

• Are you heading in a positive direction? If so, you probably have a good reason to be excited. If not, it’s time to get busy making some changes.

• Don’t compare your life to others.

• There is no comparison between the sun and the moon. They both shine when it’s their time.

• Your story is unique and different. It’s not worthy of comparison. 

• You should also not compare your situation to others because you don’t know what goes on behind the scenes.

6 – Failing to learn from failure.

Failure is rarely enjoyable, but it can be a useful experience. 

Learn from your failures and apply the knowledge to your future attempts. 

Failure can be a great tool for moving toward success. 

Repeating the same errors will provide the same results.

View failure as a learning opportunity. 

Failure should be our teacher not our undertaker. 

Failure is delay, not defeat. 

It is a temporary detour, not a dead-end. 

Never let success get to your head or failure get to your heart. 

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again more intelligently.

7 – A lack of gratitude.

Things are rarely as bad as they seem. 

Regularly reminding yourself of this can demonstrate that your life might be more wonderful than you realize. 

Use spare moments to mentally list the things that fill you with feelings of gratitude.

It will allow happiness to enter your life.

Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. 

The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for. 

Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.

8 – Settling for low standards.

It’s possible to become comfortable with poor results. 

On one hand, you might be unhappy with where you are. 

On the other hand, trying for more seems scary.

• You’re unique and capable.

• You can have a wonderful life.

• Increase your expectations. There’s no reason to settle for less.

• Set high standards for yourself and don’t settle for anything less.

• You are the best judge of yourself and your capabilities. 

• Set high standards and few limitations for yourself.

So now you know certain habits make it more challenging to experience happiness. 

Identifying and eliminating these counterproductive habits can create the necessary space for happiness to enter your life. 

You need to look into possible solutions if you are constantly asking yourself: “Why am I not happy?”

Unless there is a proper mental health issue that needs to be addressed, please do your best to allow happiness to enter your life.

Enhance the quality of your habits and you’ll experience a more positive perspective on life. 

After all, everyone deserves to be happy, including you my friend.

The Search for Happiness

Are there any habits you're trying to break right now?