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Happiness Tuesdays

Politics & Governance

Family Politics - Do's and Don'ts

I hope if you’re reading this, it’s before all your holiday festivities start! It is Christmas Eve, after all, and I think many of us could use a little “do’s and don’ts” list for avoiding family conflict/politics this holiday season.

I get that there are some families that have no boundaries and no topics are off limits - but for the rest of us, it’s usually best to avoid certain topics during the holidays so that we don’t end up in a big family feud.

First off, I’m going to start with my list of “Do’s”:

Please do…

  • Offer to help whoever is hosting with meal prep, setting the table, clean up, etc.

  • Listen more than you speak

  • Intentionally say please and thank you 

  • Keep your mouth shut if you have nothing nice to say

  • Have fun and keep a good attitude even when something might not be your favorite thing

  • Be flexible and courteous of others

  • Think before you speak

There are a lot more things to “do” but there are also a lot of things NOT to do…so here’s that list:

Please don’t…

  • Bring up hot button topics to push people’s buttons

  • Act spoiled and entitled

  • Complain about food that someone has prepared/purchased for you

  • Be ungrateful for people who love you

  • Get offended about every little thing (it’s easier to do than most of us want to admit!)

  • Be rude or offensive 

  • Be late and make everyone run on your schedule

Again, there are so many more things I could add, but I feel like these points are a very good starting point for avoiding family politics during the holidays.

The season should be enjoyable for everyone around - so make sure that you are creating an enjoyable environment with the things that are in your control ๐Ÿ™‚

Recommended Book

The Art of Gathering

May 15, 2018
ISBN: 9780698410879

Interesting Fact #1

Over 57% of the family reunions have between 50 and 149 attendees. If your reunion is going to be more than 50 people, you probably will be looking to block hotel rooms at a hotel. If that is the case, then make sure you read how to get group rates at hotels fast.

SOURCE

Interesting Fact #2

Group rates at hotel depend on the star level of the hotel you select. Statistics show that the majority (80%) stay two or more nights at a hotel so getting a great group rate at a hotel can yield a significant savings to the entire family. The following savings percentages are based on the rates we have provided clients when we get group rates for hotels.

SOURCE

Interesting Fact #3

The average cost person at most reunions is between $51-$99. This number does not include any dues, donations and fundraisers that might have occured prior to the family reunion.

SOURCE

Quote of the day

โ€œAll happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.โ€ โ€• Leo Tolstoy

Article of the day - Family gathering tips

Enjoying the company of relatives you don’t see very often is one of the best parts of family gatherings. Enjoy your day to the fullest by taking every opportunity you can to connect and speak an encouraging word to every person in attendance. In doing so, you will start a ton of great conversations and learn fun facts about your relatives. Here are a few more family gathering tips to help you make the most out of your time spent with loved ones.

Enjoy your tribe to the fullest with these family gathering tips

  1. Talk about past memories. If it’s an annual gathering that’s been going on since you were a kid, start a conversation to bring up some of the funny and heartwarming memories of years gone by. Include aunts, uncles, and cousins as you relive the “good ole days”.
  2. Get into a conversation with your favorite relatives. If you just them a hug or a handshake and move on, you may be missing out on special stories and memories.
  3. Changing up your surroundings where you normally host your gatherings are both great ways to encourage fresh conversation and connections. Make an effort to create a Family Gathering Committee.  Rotate members in and out every gathering so everyone has a chance of honing their leadership and planning skills.
  4. Crack a joke at an unexpected time, or grab a smaller group to go hunt down some hot chocolate.
  5. Exchange phone numbers and emails with cousins and others you’ve grown distant from. You might have lost your childhood closeness, but why not bring that closeness back as adults? That way, when the next family gathering rolls around, you’ll already feel connected, both as family members and as friends.
  6. Whip up some of your favorite recipes as a special treat. Or make it a recipe swap, either with or without the actual dishes. Start a fun new family tradition by creating a family “Secret Recipe” collection that can be added to over the years.
  7. Create some completely new Family Traditions. Whether serious or funny, family traditions are the catalyst for bonding opportunities that can be continued for hundreds of years. Just make sure they’re memorable and a somehow representative of your family.

So, dust off your electronic family address book and plan a get-together. Gather for an annual winter marshmallow roast, a monthly poker game, or a quarterly brunch where you all wear your finest clothes and drink orange tea. After all, anything goes. It’s tradition!

Wilderness Edge Retreat & Conference Centre is one of the largest providers of family gathering facilities in Central Canada.

Question of the day - Which โ€œdoโ€ or โ€œdonโ€™tโ€ would you add to the list for how to avoid family drama during the holidays?

Politics & Governance

Which โ€œdoโ€ or โ€œdonโ€™tโ€ would you add to the list for how to avoid family drama during the holidays?