You have no posts

We reward new content.


Whoo Knew

No replies

Share your opinion on topics.



No entries

Win gift cards and more.

Your Profile







Truth & Character Thursdays

Debatable Issues & Moral Questions

Should You Give Money Away When You Are In Debt?

I remember an argument that my husband and I had years ago when we were newly married. 

We were desperately in debt and struggling to keep up with our bills. I was in school and he was freshly laid off due to a seasonal job. It was a tough time for us.

One day I got home late after a full day of school and work and checked our bank account. I noticed that there was a $50 charge from the post office for shipping something so I asked him about it.

He told me that he had shipped an old text book to a friend in need. I was LIVID. 

Here we were struggling through it and my husband was spending money on other people. 

It was not a pretty argument and it’s one I still think of often because it brought up the debate about whether or not we should be generous and give money away when we were in debt.

My husband thought he was being generous and helping out someone who was worse off than us. I was upset because it felt like he was disregarding the difficulty of our situation.

My opinion on this has changed over the years to align more with my husband’s. I think it’s a balance because I believe generosity should always apply. However, I do believe that there are certain times when we have to say no to requests for our money as well.

I’m still not sure if I would choose to send a text book, but I would definitely think about it through a different set of lenses today than I did all those years ago. 

What do you think? Should you give money away and be generous when you are in debt or not?

Recommended Book

The Generosity Habit

Mar 25, 2022
ISBN: 9781635822489

Interesting Fact #1

One study found generosity actually reduced blood pressure as much as medicine and exercise.


Interesting Fact #2

Giving our time and money to others gives us an emotional boost. Why? According to researcher Christian Smith it’s because feeling good is a product of doing good. It’s built into our neurochemistry. Giving triggers feel-good chemicals like endorphins, dopamine, and oxytocin. And it’s true across cultural and economic lines, too, according to a Harvard Business School study. It’s just part of being human.


Interesting Fact #3

Generosity lowers our stress. We don’t think of Scrooge as a mellow guy, do we? Here’s why. It turns out being stingy can actually raise our stress levels. After hooking people up to heart monitors, researchers found that when they felt they were giving too little in a transaction it actually drove up their stress. Being generous, on the other hand, kept stress down. It’s like the Golden Rule in action.


Quote of the day

“You have not lived today until you have done something for someone who can never repay you.” ― John Bunyan

Article of the day - The Benefits of Generosity

The Dalai Lama famously said, “If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” The same is certainly true for generosity! Generosity — the quality of being kind and understanding, the willingness to give others things that have value — is often defined as an act of selflessness; however, studies are now showing that generosity is actually (selfishly) in your best interest. Practicing generosity is a mental health principle, and it could be the very key to a happy and healthy life.

Year after year, more and more studies are highlighting the benefits of generosity on both our physical and mental health. Not only does generosity reduce stress, support one’s physical health, enhance one’s sense of purpose, and naturally fight depression, it is also shown to increase one’s lifespan.

If a longer, less stressful and more meaningful life is not enough to inspire you to rev up your practice of generosity, consider that generosity also promotes a social connection and improves relationships. According to Jason Marsh and Jill Suttie of the Greater Good Science Center, “When we give to others, we don’t only make them feel closer to us; we also feel closer to them.” This is because being generous and kind encourages us to perceive others in a more positive light and fosters a sense of community, a feeling of interconnectedness.

Being generous also makes us feel better about ourselves. Generosity is both a natural confidence builder and a natural repellant of self-hatred. By focusing on what we are giving rather than on what we are receiving, we create a more outward orientation toward the world, which shifts our focus away from ourselves. While maintaining a healthy level of self-awareness and sensitivity to oneself is important, too often we narrow in on ourselves with a negative lens. We spend too much time listening to the “critical inner voice” in our heads, which scrutinizes our every move and nags at us with negative thoughts towards ourselves and others. These negative thoughts undermine our confidence and can lead to self-sabotage. Being generous distracts us from the critical inner voice’s barrage of nasty thoughts and creates a strong argument against it as well. When we see someone else benefiting from our kind actions, for instance, it is hard for the inner voice to argue that we are worthless.

Four Steps to Fully Practicing Generosity

Give something that is sensitive to the other person.

Generosity is most effective when the gift you offer is sensitive. Think about what the other person wants or needs. It’s not always about material things; it’s about being giving of yourself. Sometimes just being present and available to a loved one who is having a hard time is the greatest gift you could possibly give.

Accept appreciation.

It is important to be open to the people who express appreciation toward you. Generosity is a two-way street, allowing someone to express their gratitude is an important aspect of generosity and part of what makes you feel closer to them. As researchers in the Department of Psychology at University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill have discovered, “The emotion of gratitude uniquely functions to build a high-quality relationship between a grateful person and the target of his or her gratitude, that is, the person who performed a kind action.” So it is important to not brush off a “thank you” with comments like “Oh, it was nothing.”

Accept the generosity of others.

Some people have a much easier time being giving than receiving. However, it is important to let others do things for you. I call this the generosity of acceptance. Being pseudo-independent or self-denying robs your loved ones of the opportunity to feel the joy of giving. Accepting the generosity of others may make you uncomfortable if you felt unlovable or unworthy in your early life. Generosity is often an act of love, and, though it may seem counterintuitive, many people respond negatively to being loved.

Show appreciation.

Remember that gratitude is an important part of the equation. Show your appreciation for the generosity that is directed toward you, even if you feel shy or uncomfortable. Resist the temptation to say things like “This is too much,” or “You shouldn’t have.” Instead just say “Thank you!” Or, better yet, let the person know what their generosity meant to you.

Generosity is truly the gift that keeps on giving. Each day life presents us with hundreds of opportunities to be generous; by making a lifestyle out of generosity, we can do ourselves and others a world of good.

Question of the day - Should you give money away and be generous when you are in debt or not?

Debatable Issues & Moral Questions

Should you give money away and be generous when you are in debt or not?