I Choose to Be Positive

 November 29, 2015

When you’re going through a tough moment, the worst thing you can be told, which rubs you the wrong way, is a saying like: Be positive! Don’t take things the wrong way! I’ve also been through tough moments!… And it always makes a little voice go off in your head that says: You’re going to give me advice? I’d like to see you in my place!

There are situations that get the best of us, that arrive unexpectedly, or that we expected but with uncertainty. Like that tale in which a boy warns of the coming of a wolf over and over again, but which never really arrives. It was just to scare them. But then in the end, the wolf does come, at least for a little while.

“Optimism solves half of every problem.”

-Jorge González Moore-

There are moments that you’re so enraged with yourself, with the world, with others’ comments, that being positive can be very hard to do…

They are moments in which we don’t see the light. And the last thing we want to hear is empty words or useless pieces of advice that always sound the same. They sound like typical words of consolation that even the person who is saying them doesn’t believe in.

But when we don’t find ourselves in those moments, maybe that’s when we should put in the time and do the work. We should work on ourselves and learn to be more positive. Without getting overwhelmed, little by little.

We should make some inner changes that will help us when the time comes and we really need it. Like a shoemaker that reinforces your shoes when you’re planning to go on a long walk.

Those changes will be there when the time comes. It will help to cushion the blow. Just like those shoes. They’re not infallible, but they help.

Therefore, since it’s all up to us, let’s decide to be positive.

What can help us be more positive?

1. “Company in distress makes the sorrow less.”

It’s a very good phrase, except for the “makes the sorrow less” part; life is full of disappointments for everyone and if you stop to look at yourself and take a look around you, you will see that everyone’s life is full of good things and not so good things. You’re not the only one who has bad moments.

2. Everything has a solution.

It seems silly, but mentally repeating this phrase when we’re distressed, thinking that everything will change. Thinking that the situation is temporary, it may relieve us greatly. Though it’s clear that we must implement strategies for it, because things don’t change on their own. 

3. Surround yourself with positive people.

There are certain people we have a special “feeling” for, and they have the ability to heal our wounds with a heartfelt hug, some sweet words and that special charm that not everyone has. Let it all out with them, tell them what’s going on with you, and be sincere. Surely, you’ll feel much more relieved for it.

4. Find your own haven of peace.

Each one of us has our own haven of peace. You just have to look for it. Some find deep solace in expressing their sorrow through dance, music or writing. Others prefer a break outdoors, such as the countryside or the mountains… The thing is to find the place where calmness and tranquility are your companions.

Obviously there are extreme situations that not everyone goes through and where surely everyone needs the help of professionals. But when faced with the adversities of everyday life, though sometimes they seem to want to hit you all together, I choose to be positive.

“Optimism– just like hope- means having a strong expectation that, in general, things will go well despite setbacks and frustrations. From the point of view of emotional intelligence, optimism is a positive attitude that prevents you from falling into apathy, despair or depression when faced with adversity. And like with her sister cousin, hope, optimism has its benefits. As long as we’re talking about realistic optimism. Because naive optimism can be disastrous. “

-Daniel Goleman-