If you have ever thought about giving up suddenly, check your emotions (and your long-term goals) first.
How to convince yourself when you are about to quit out of anger
Recently, the pressure has been great and the temper may be short. As a result, you may find yourself at a loss-angry, upset, or ready to resign. But in the long run, what seems to be a good idea at the moment may not be the best choice. Known as "quitting smoking in anger," if you haven't thought about what it takes to find new things, or if you give up more than you have to get elsewhere, the decision to give up towels impulsively may not do you good.
But when you feel that you can't stand the challenges of work and colleagues (so "you already have it")-how do you find the calmness you need to make the right decision?
Brain science helps to understand: When you go crazy or are triggered by something, your brain will switch to a fight or flight response, and your amygdala will take over. This is the part of your brain responsible for automatic emotional and behavioral responses. When you are hijacked by the amygdala, it conceals the part of your brain responsible for regulating emotions and evaluating behavior. In a state of extreme upset, you basically cannot enter your rational and logical thinking process. If you take actions in that state, you are more likely to regret them, because they may not be in your own long-term best interests-based on the limitations of your thinking.
But you can manage yourself, you can think about what is best, and you can act wisely. You only need a little expertise to put this method into practice.
Self-check to manage emotions
When you are on the edge and need to convince yourself, the first thing to do is breathe. Breathing can oxygenate your blood and help your brain remain open to broader thinking, rather than narrower, threatened responses. Taking a few deep breaths will also give you time to think critically and consider how you want to react.
In the process of staying away from quick reactions and emotional reactions, you can focus on your thinking process. The way we think about situations can escalate or reduce our frustration. Each of us is responsible for our emotions. Remind yourself to be patient and you have the ability to handle difficult situations with confidence and composure.
Remember: Usually when people act in ways that you find difficult, it is more about them than about you. The rude email you received from your colleague may reflect the pressure he is under. Maybe the outfit you get from your client reflects the pressure she is under at the company. These explanations do not make their behavior acceptable, but when you understand it, your own emotions can be more effectively controlled by you.
When you are controlled by strong emotions, giving yourself some natural scenery is also effective. Many studies have shown that being close to nature can restore vitality. Take a quick walk around the block, breathe in the fresh air through the windows, or take a moment to admire the scenery outside. Any of these options may be effective. You can also consider using some tunes to distract yourself. Music can have a similar positive effect, restoring your peace, so you can consider the best measures for the next step.
Take time to reflect
When you are so annoyed that you want to quit, it is important to take an inventory. Make time to reflect and think about problems. This will also help you revisit a clearer and more balanced thinking process, so the actions you take are the best way for you to move forward.
Here are a few questions to ask yourself:
Is this an unusual situation or a trend? If you have been fighting a boss who lacks integrity for years, it may be time to take action. On the other hand, if a colleague who is usually grumpy has just lost his cool with you, this may be an opportunity to forgive and move on.
What role do you play in this situation? In this case, consider your own responsibilities, and consider how to improve your skills or responses to create a positive atmosphere or a solution to the problem.
Are you overreacting? Also consider whether your answer is directly proportional to the question. Sometimes your own challenges outside of work will shorten your fuse. If you are moving, a glitch at work may disturb you more than usual. Or, if you have a difficult time with your partner, it can affect your perception of people who don’t seem to respond quickly enough at work. Even too little sleep can make you angry more easily. Maintain your perspective by understanding how the broader context affects your reactions.
Will this matter in the long run? Although things seem important now, it is helpful to consider whether they are important tomorrow, next week, or next year. Extending the time frame can remind you that the problem may not be as important as it seems, and allow you to put it aside.
Can you influence the situation? Another useful consideration is your own degree of influence. If the source of your frustration is a systemic problem that you have little control over (for example, a toxic culture, or a leadership team that lacks respect for employees), then it may make sense to move on. However, if the problem is that you can positively affect it by recommending changes or shaping positive behaviors, then the company can definitely benefit from your patience.
If you do decide that quitting smoking is your best course of action, please ask yourself a few more questions:
Are you able to quit smoking? Even the most attractive candidates in today's hot job market need time to find new things, so make sure you have sufficient funding channels to find new positions.
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