The Most Overlooked Secret to Dealing with Life’s Problems
February 26, 2012
How often have you been living life, happy and content, and then suddenly life slaps you in the face with something unexpected? We all have problems, and the truth of the matter is that problems will never go away. They will just change form.
One time you may be struggling with health, the next with money, and still the next with relationships. That is both the curse and blessing of life.
However, you don’t have to suffer because everything isn’t perfect in your life.
Behind the Scenes of Problems
Nothing becomes a problem until you label it so. You’ve probably noticed that different people have different opinions of what problems are, and how much attention should be given to any one thing. This means that problems exist in our heads, and that we create them, define them, and fear them.
I, for example, am great at worrying about problems that do not even exist, and I’m sure you’re no different. But that doesn’t change the fact that problems are made-up.
The Most Overlooked Secret
The secret to dealing with life’s problems is to realize that they are illusions of our imagination. Sure, they feel very real. I’m not denying that.
Let’s say you’re driving your car merrily down the highway, until someone cuts you off. You might fly off the handle, or you might not. It will depend on how you perceive the situation. It’s an excellent example of how some people create something to complain about where others are completely fine.
Life will always have “problems” and the way to deal with them is to let them be. You don’t have to try to analyze, fantasize, or figure out your problems. Let them figure themselves out. The more you try, the more you fuel the problem, and the more miserable you become.
This doesn’t mean you stop solving problems. It means you stop the compulsive worrying and fear-mongering inside your head.
How to Stop the Compulsive Worrying
You can stop the madness by simply staying present, and letting whatever happens be. This can be extremely hard if you bump into a problem that is important to you, but it is through those big problems that the biggest changes occur.
For example, I tend to freak out whenever something threatens my health. I can even go into a cold sweat, which I did a few weeks ago about a possible dental issue. But I remained present. I observed the freak out within my own body and mind without fueling it by thinking and trying to figure it out.
I was the observer of my thoughts, and you know what happened? The thoughts lost momentum and disappeared. The freak out ended within 30 minutes. Some people are so good at freaking out that it goes on for years, or even worse, their whole life.
Why is Life so Hard?
Life can seem tough from time to time, but it is through those tough times that you grow as a human being. It’s uncomfortable, yup, but that’s life.
It’s a rollercoaster with both highs and lows, which we all have to live through, so you might as well learn how to deal with the lows. The more comfortable you become with life’s problems, the more you’ll enjoy life’s gifts.
Conclusion
Life is what it is, and most of life’s problems are created by us. The problems are events in our life, no one is denying that, but the extrapolation that we do freaks us out, and then we wonder why we feel so bad.
It’s a life-long habit most of us have cultivated, which means we can change it. But change starts with awareness.
So, today all I want you to do is be aware of how you worry and freak yourself out, then simply watch your thoughts. You will be pulled back into the drama of your mind, but gently pull your attention back to just watching what goes on.
Be kind to yourself, and enjoy both the highs and the lows.
Written on 2/26/2012 by Henri Junttila.
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