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Outlooks & Setbacks Saturdays

Positive & Negative Attitudes

Making A Mountain Out Of A Mole Hill

My oldest and I are working hard on learning NOT to make a mountain out of a mole hill when any little thing happens.

I often find it interesting to parent in this current world where we are trying to be so in tune with everyone’s emotions and to always let a child feel how they feel. The truth is that sometimes we need to learn to keep our emotions in check and we cannot always let our emotions run the day.

That is a more difficult thing for some kids to learn than others - and my oldest has a difficult time with this. I was like that as a child as well. I used to get called over-dramatic: also known as making a mountain out of a mole hill.

My daughter will do things like flop on the floor and start crying when she bonks her elbow gently on something - something that might hurt a little bit but that you ultimately have to learn to cope with because you are fine.

She wants me to come coddle her every time something happens - and as her parent I am struggling to know how to help her become more resilient.

I know as an adult, I can still make a mountain out of a mole hill - my brain just takes something and runs with it and before I know it, everything has been catastrophized. I truly have to work hard at managing my thoughts so that they don’t run away on me. This includes talking to myself and reminding myself that I am strong and capable and that a small setback doesn’t determine my success or failure. 

We are working hard on positive thoughts and the importance of the words we tell ourselves. I often come back to the quote from Henry Ford, “whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.” What we tell ourselves matters, and I believe that this impacts our ability to be resilient and to learn not to make a mountain out of every mole hill.

Interesting Fact #1

Develop the habit of being on time. This isn't just good for a military operation. Being on time is an unspoken message to others that you value them and their time as equally as you do your own. On the flip side, consistently being late sends the signal that you don't really care about how you may be inconveniencing others or that your time and agenda is far more valuable than theirs. Neither message bodes well for the long term.

SOURCE

Interesting Fact #2

Sending a prompt reply. Nothing says you're not worth my time quite like failing to respond to a text, phone message or email. I'm not talking about times where the outreach is from someone like a telemarketer or email blast from somebody's LinkedIn business account. The response does not have to be lengthy. It can even contain bad news like, "Thanks for reaching out, but right now is not a good time to connect."

SOURCE

Interesting Fact #3

Additionally, being habitually late sends the signal to others that if your late to a meeting (something rather simple) the odds are pretty good that you'll fail to deliver on time in other more complex and challenging projects. Ultimately, your consistent tardiness could be having a significant impact on your ability to get bigger projects and to be considered for bigger roles.

SOURCE

Quote of the day

“By building mountains out of molehills, through lying by omission, agenda-setting, framing stories and issues in a certain light, and by manipulating what is spread through social media by either limiting its reach or artificially amplifying it, the major media and tech companies try, and they do, influence the way people think and thus how they act.” ― Mark Dice

Article of the day - It’s only a big deal if you make it one

Ever have something big happen – usually something bad or dramatic (but this observation is also the same if it’s good) that you found yourself telling everyone about?

What happens when you do? Did you notice that an energy built around it?

Especially on social media, you tell all your friends and they respond, and then their friends respond, and it gets bigger and bigger.

This is especially true of big problems or tragedy, when emotions are involved, or someone has wronged you.

You tell more and more people and the more you tell, the bigger the story becomes. Maybe you share it word for word, but it’s the emotion that gets higher and higher!

What if you didn’t tell anyone about it?

What if you just quietly went about making it right where required, but didn’t tell anyone?

Kept it quiet, just solved the problem. Have you ever done that?

If so, you would have noticed that the energy was entirely different.

I guarantee that you could take a situation, and handle it two very different ways and get two very different results, just by making it a big deal or no deal at all.

Same facts, same situation, different response.

It’s part of being a human; we want to align ourselves with other people like us and part of that process is building a tribe of like-minded friends.

When we share stories and work to elicit emotions in others, we then gain momentum and justification for our own emotions and identify with those that agree with us.

The problem is, sometimes we get lost in the drama and instead of working on a solution we end up making things worse than they really are.

It’s why people love to complain about the weather as a first step in conversation, particularly between strangers or people you don’t know well.

It’s a safe bet that everyone is grumpy about the cold, cold winter we have had, and all the snow is well – insert whatever negative opinion you have here.

Chances are you will immediately find a sympathetic person to jump on board your rant and off you go into the energy bliss!

Sure, occasionally you may complain about all the snow and cold weather to a person who LOVES it, and guess what? It falls flat! No alignment, no drama, so you find a new topic.

But how can we use this in our favour?

How do we build energy towards something we want instead of building drama around something we don’t?

What about setting a great set of goals around health and fitness and then surrounding yourself with amazing people up to the same thing?

Each week you share progresses, successes, photos, share food recipes, tips, tricks, go to classes together and cheer each other on.

How does that change everything? From my experience as a trainer for 20 years, a LOT!

Now you are building an energy in the direction you want to go! Now everyone is winning!

Gathering people to you through an excited discussion around moving forward and getting stronger, and more fit! Each success builds to another success and the inspiration grows!

What if you made success a big deal?

And problems, well, what if you just dealt with them and never even mentioned them?

They would have no energy, become powerless and minor. If you do not complain about the weather, nothing changes and you don’t lose any energy.

What if instead, you gave all of your big energy to things you wanted to happen, and people you wanted in your life and none of it to the things that annoyed you and you wanted to just go away.

Sure, taxes and bad government may never go away, but getting all angry and talking about it won’t change anything, it will just steal your energy.

Make your best life a big deal and give it all the energy you can! Handle your problems and never say a word about them.

Then watch the magic unfold!

Happy Training!

Scott McDermott is a personal trainer and the owner of Best Body Fitness in Sylvan Lake.

Question of the day - What is some helpful advice for not making a mountain out of a mole hill that you’ve received?

Positive & Negative Attitudes

What is some helpful advice for not making a mountain out of a mole hill that you’ve received?