All the relationships associated with love can be reduced to the types of connections: love from excess and love from lack.
Relationship types
Love from excess is when you are in harmony with yourself and the world. You do not need your beloved as a source of happiness, self-confidence, proof of your need, saving you from the fear of loneliness, entertainer, caretaker, etc. . You are all right with this. A woman's love for you in such a situation is a pleasant but unnecessary bonus. And your love for her is just a gift you want to give this particular woman.
Love from a lack is when you need her to love you; without it, you feel bad. A woman is a salvation for you, a source of strength, happiness, etc. Is it possible to talk about your love as a gift in such a situation? Of course not. This is a common swap: you - to me, I - to you. Maybe it can't even be called love—just mutually beneficial coexistence. Most people live this way, and some even manage to live happily. Well, if two one-legged disabled people lean against each other, it will be more stable, and you can even be happy for them.
What to do?
In psychological practice, there is more than one situation when a man who loves a woman from a lack, firstly, like the last rag, strives to please her in everything, breaks himself to be the way she needs, and not the way she is, that is, different, herself (but how? After all, she, God forbid, will be disappointed in him.), And what is characteristic, she is the first to stop respecting him for this. He also makes excuses and begs for forgiveness like a delinquent puppy. Secondly, he is afraid of losing her and shies away into insane jealousy, then into forgiveness, and she again loses respect for him. Thirdly, he hurts her with his demands, suspicions, and reproaches: here I am, and here you are. Of course, this applies equally to men and women, and then men already lose respect for a woman.
So it turns out, first - love yourself, and then love a woman, otherwise - neither yourself nor her.
At the same time, love from excess should not be understood as endless altruism. After all, if you love and respect yourself, you will not forget about your interests. You are a man, not a holy spirit. You are a normal person with your own goals in life, advantages, and disadvantages. The truth of life is that only next to such a man who respects his interests and can defend his position a woman feels like a woman: protected and truly loved not by a henpecked man but by a master.
In love from excess, in the first place, for you, your interests can and should be, such as Sock JOI, and this, oddly enough, contributes to the feeling of happiness of everyone else around you https://footjungle.com/. And in love from lack, the interests of the beloved woman come first, but this sacrifice is false, not bringing happiness to either her or you.
Conclusion
However, by and large, in love from excess, it doesn't matter who / what is in what place. Any, even the same, act will be subconsciously perceived by a woman in different ways, depending on whether the man did it, as a disinterested gift or as an advance in the expectation of receiving in return. So there is only one way out - to be, not to seem. First, find harmony in yourself, and then invite a woman into your harmonious world.
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