Identify

Sometimes I get lost in myself,

Shattered pieces of my heart,

Broken.

Spiritually asleep,

Never to be awoken.

Depressed, anxious, suicidal?

Possibly.

But I’m too arrogant

To admit, I am weak.

Who are you? What is your purpose in life?

And how do you define who you are?

These are the questions that get you thinking.

Thinking, because at the time,

We don’t seem to find

A foundation for who we are

And how does our light shine?

So I guess I’m just outta line.

I’m just a high school graduate,

Transitioning to life in college.

It seems this world revolves around,

“Do you have enough knowledge?”

Get into the right school. Get a degree.

Make a little cash. Let that all define me.

Earn the respect. Gain the world.

Praised by men. I’ll know my worth.

College-bound, UC Davis,

I was born to be the greatest,

So you know I need to keep up with the latest…

Latest trend, be one step ahead of them.

Be different, so that I catch the attention.

Check me with that name brand,

I’ma just do it

I just wanna be the cool kid,

Dressed in these filthy rags to riches,

Will they start to look up to me

If I’m pulling all these…

Life of the party, living it up.

Hide the scars of my skin,

Even when the pain gets rough.

Blood of Filipinos,

Cracking jokes,

Throwing insults,

Just to fit in.

That's what my life’s all about.

Me, myself and I, Yessir.

Put me in the center

Of the crowd

So I stand out.

But I need another follower.

Let me get one more.

Or I’ll be climbing up this ladder,

Never content with how much money that I’m makin’

I need a girl to show the world.

She’s the one I need to search for.

Hating the singleness status.

Now give me the best,

So that you know that I am the man.

Gotta keep it low-key,

Soft-words to calm the fact that it's false humility.

Humility is just a foreign concept.

Secret desire to hide the fact,

I want to be the one they're noticing.

Voices telling me

You gotta search it in you

My identity is found in myself.

I define who I am.

Yet the pride inside of me keeps telling me

There’s always another being

I need to compete against.

Survival of the fittest,

Use your muscle or be on the hit list,

I’m just a collection of atoms and stardust,

So what does it

Matter if I’ma show fist.

Here by accident,

Not in final form,

I wonder who I’ll become

After this process of macroevolution.

Nothing to lead up to this explosion.

Oh the Big Bang,

Needs to rearrange the Second Law,

Where I ain't fanatical

For the Thermodynamical,

Just a little bit more than an animal,

Technically atheist in relationship to God,

it ain't personal.

Only love you if you react to MY chemicals,

Unbalanced in the low likeliness of statistical probability,

For all this order and complexity in this universe.

Time, matter and space,

Bounds my greatness,

But my fame and my own name,

O Yes I am still tryna’ rehearse.

(Pause)

The Devil spittin’ a verse,

To the youth, he lyin’ through

Darwin,

I believe it,

So it’s how I define who I am.

But the real question is,

Who am I in the eyes of the Lord?

“None is good, no, not one,” says the Word.

I’m just a sinner who’s fallen short of the glory of God.

Raised Catholic,

Religiously good on the outside

But I robbed God of His glory.

When it’s all about what I DO,

I am the hero of my own story.

Deserving to be rejected from His presence

For all eternity,

Into the flames, so fiery,

No more ballin' like Kyrie.

Caught up in misery,

Soul and flesh decaying,

From this injury.

I lost my identity.

There goes my money, hopes and dreams.

‘Cuz in the end, I never really knew Him,

He’ll say, “He never knew me.”

Death row, here we go,

Here I am

On bended knee.

Weeks and weeks go by.

No, I can’t do nothing.

Confessing, repenting,

Praying “Jesus, can you save me?”

Taking control of my heart,

Now I see the Spirit overflowing.

See this was me.

Then Christ intervened.

Christ was perfect.

I ain't even close to it.

Christ, the righteous Son.

I, the unrighteous one.

Christ had no sin.

I loved my sin.

The full wrath of God displayed on Christ.

Now I no longer pay the price.

The question still remains on

Who I am? Who am I?

Well the just died for the unjust,

To call me JUSTIFIED.

My eternal, infinite God whose love

Unbounded by matter, space and time,

Created me as a part of creation’s intelligent design,

Made an entrance into the finiteness of mankind,

He humbled Himself to the point of death

To save me from my sinful pride.

Call me FORGIVEN, my sin He carried,

Took my guilt and shame, no need to hide.

Now I see Him at work in my life.

Guiding me daily, so I’m SANCTIFIED.

Not by me, but grace through faith alone I’m SAVED,

So Christ be glorified.

No longer it is I who live,

With Christ I’m CRUCIFIED.

(slower pace, soft-tone)

Don't need to seek within,

‘Cuz now I’m BORN-AGAIN.

Therefore SINCE I am in Christ,

I am a NEW CREATION.

Once sought the approval of the world,

Though the world I was apart of, rejected Christ,

Mocked and beat

And put Him on a cross.

But because He rose again,

I no longer need the world’s acceptance.

LOVED by Jesus,

He looks at me as if I’m SINLESS.

So I’m a WITNESS,

To some I got mental illness

When I’m empowered by the Holy Spirit

Passionately making me courageous

To talk about them circumstances,

Losses and my own sin,

UNASHAMED of the gospel,

The power of God for salvation.

That’s why nothing can taken away

My eternal citizenship in Heaven. No.

‘Cuz to those

Who believed in Christ,

FREED to live for you,

PREDESTINED before the womb

To be conformed into the image of His Son,

In the likeness of the only one

Who forever will be second to none.

So I Guess I’m not single,

Go ahead and check my Facebook,

There will be a day,

Got assurance that I’ll see Him face to face,

Look, my name is written in

His everlasting book of life.

IN A RELATIONSHIP,

With Christ, With Him, I’m RECONCILED…

Hey, ma. Got my PhD.

Studying the Messiah,

A degree in Macrobiology.

Or is it micro, grab a microscope.

Observe His attributes closely…

Mercy and grace, to me, it ain't fair.

Received a free pair, no student loans.

Better than Ray-bans,

See my prescription,

A new focus,

My new vision, twenty-twenty.

I see His blessings. Count it, plenty.

DRESSED in His clothes, His shoes,

That's GOLD infinite worth.

You know that's right.

Never fading, LEGENDARY.

Okay. MJ, Take flight

The soul, SATISFIED.

Formerly enslaved,

In darkness

To my sins in contrast to the Light,

Sriracha sauce on that soul food.

Better taste than adobo,

His word, eat good.

Mercy, combo.

This is my identity,

It has an ultimatum.

PURCHASED by His blood,

I’ve been ADOPTED

And given the right

To become a CHILD OF GOD.